


These Are The Voyages Of The Starship Excalibur....

by WYLD_STALLYZ



Category: Merlin (TV), Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: Discovery, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Also Maybe fun Klingon Stuff???????, Alternate Universe - Star Trek Fusion, Gen, I just wanted to put Merlin...IN SPACE, M/M, Other, Post-Romulan Wars, Some Battle Stuff, Starfleet, kinda violent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-15 08:41:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29681340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WYLD_STALLYZ/pseuds/WYLD_STALLYZ
Summary: BBC Merlin.... IN SPAACCEE! A Star Trek AU of Merlin, that leans heavy on the Star part of the Trek.Commander Merlin Emrys must learn to work with hotshot cap-i-tan Arthur Pendragon and the rest of the Excalibur crew on a 3 year mission into newly expanded Federation space following a brutal Romulan/Cardassian War. Arthur is eager to prove him self beyond his father as Merlin grapples with new realities in his life. Gwaine tags along, magic is a lot harder then it looks, and Will...well, it'd be a bit much to say he's there for moral support. You name it, adventure, mystery, classic "I hate your guts but I can't get enough" banter, and hey, who knows? Maybe even some Klingon warrior monks will be next episodes special guest? Maybe?
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	1. Caged In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On this weeks episode of Merlin.....IN SPACE!  
> Merlin face a court of Starfleet brass who all just have one question, what happened at the Battle of Ganatil belt? And more importantly, why was Merlin the last man standing? All these questions and more in....The Voyages Of The Starship Excalibur! Episode 1: "Caged In"

_Stardate 2262.263_

Merlin was, usually, fairly unfazed under any scrutiny. Well, that's at least what he liked to think of himself. He was a smart-ass and charming most of the time, and if he didn’t win you over _somehow_ then he just accepted it and moved on…. However in this case, he kind of would have been okay with turning himself into a tribble right about now.

It wasn’t like he was in trouble really, hell, this was a _commendation_ hearing for Christ sakes! He was being ‘honored’ for his service…. sort of. It was still a hearing and no amount of ‘we appreciate your service Commander’ and ‘Starfleet is impressed by your actions’ were going to convince him he wasn’t really being subtly skinned alive by the plethora of Starfleet Command officers now glaring him down. He was starting to think tribbles got a bad wrap; it seemed like a nice, _mercifully_ short existence at the moment.

“Commander Emrys, while we are appreciative of your actions during your service aboard the _U.S.S Monmouth_ and the many battles you participated in and many rescues you helped organize, it is still imperative we are clear of the events that lead to the near fatal injury of your commanding officer, Captain Kilgharrah, that lead to you assuming acting captaincy of the _Monmouth_ .” stated the severe Tellarite admiral with the all too pointy tusks. _Well, I guess they dropped the subtlety in the vivisection department._

“It is true Commander Emrys, that since Captain Kilgharrah is still in treatment at Starfleet Medical your account of exactly what happened at the Battle for the Ganatil belt….”

_Jeezz, they already gave it a name? It's only been 2 months._

“...is one of the only complete accounts from a bridge officer of that day. Most of the other higher ranking officers were aboard the destroyed _U.S.S Tempest_ and the damaged _U.S.S. Crazy Horse_ , leaving you as a sole voice in what happened regarding the 3 Romulan Warbirds that were still in pursuit after the destruction of the _Tempest_ and the crippling of the _Crazy Horse_.” another commodore said.

“Sir?” Merlin said, although he regretted it as soon as he met the gaze of one of the Vulcan admiralty who looked like she might just break him in two for his insubordination. 

“The account of what happened onboard before the other federation vessels arrived seems to this counsel to indicate a rather rash decision on your part in regards to the rest of the crew of the _Monmouth,_ the-”

“What I think Commodore Sigan is trying to say,” interrupted one of the Vice-Admirals “is that your decision to initiate a override self destruct sequence without the console of other officers, would indicate a, well, rather dramatic escalation of events!” he ended with poorly veil condescension.

“I’m not sure I follow sir.” Merlin said while trying very hard not to start throwing punches.

“Did you start an override self destruct sequence?” said the andorian general on the far end.

“Yes sir.”

“Did you do this without other officers’ voice input?”

“Yes sir, I did, howev-”

“And you did this knowing full well you would be taking the lives of your crew?”

“I did sir, yes, but as my report unequivocally stated, ( _I’m starting to wonder if anyone even read it)_ I was the only command officer left on the bridge, and once we were boarded by the Romul-”

“Did you make any attempt to find another command officer before initiating the protocol?” chimed in Admiral Olafe

“Of course I did! But seeing as how all were either unconscious, in sick bay, or dead, I had no other command rank officer on the bridge to ‘console’ with!” and he was deeply proud he restrained himself from using air quotes right then. 

“What of Chief Engineer Gili? Or Chief Medical Officer S’Tya? Did you not try to contact them from the bridge?” the Vulcan admiral spoke up.

“Our engineering bay was almost entirely destroyed with the hits we took from the scout ships while entering the Ganatil belt. Engineer Gili was lost along with the 104 other crew members that were killed after the shield arrays went down and the ventral nacelle was destroyed. Our sick bay had been damaged and Doctor S’Tya had been critically wounded. We were running on low-axillary from that point on, most going to what was left of the shields….Sir.” 

_Don’t cry. Don’t cry. You always cry when you get angry. Suck it up._

“Did you make any attempt to contact the _Crazy Horse_ or any other federation vessel to confer with any other officer or captain in the lead up to you initiating the protocol?” Admiral Sigan said

“I would have if, as stated before, our ventral nacelle had not been _destroyed_ , we couldn’t even communicate through the ship! All of our systems were essentially offline, and I did what I saw as the only possible play in that situation. Would you have liked me to ask the 4 terrified ensigns trying to fight off boarding Romulans what I should have done?” 

And Merlin thought he might just get up and start shaking the admirals one by one to try and make them understand he did what he had no other choice but to do. The cold stares coming from them were getting to be a little too much and he was tired of sitting here like _he_ had destroyed the _Monmouth_ and everyone onboard. It was almost like they had skimmed all the most dramatic details from his report and the reports of the other ships and picked the ones that sounded the most damning. 

“Commander Emrys, no one on this council is saying your actions were not justified, w-” but he had had about enough of this and if he couldn’t get out of this room right now, he was going to cry or scream or…. something that would probably get him sent to some lab somewhere on a planet no one knows exists to be tested on for the rest of his very sad life.

_Ya, tribbles have it easy._

“-we are merely trying to get to the point of whether or not manual override destruct was strictly necessary?” 

“Am being court martialed for my actions, admirals? Because if so, I know that you know I am guaranteed a detailed indictment of what I am b-” But before he could really throw out all the veiled insults and threats he wanted, Commodore Sigan interrupted him.

“ _Emrys…_ We are not here to court-martial you, but so help me we will if you do not cooperate on this matter! Is that clear commander?” and the dangerous glare sent his way by Sigan was enough that he bit his tongue hard enough he thought he might just chew it off. 

“Yes sir, absolutely clear.” and really, he couldn't help if it came out as more of a snap then an answer.

“Now please, if you will commander, tell us, _succinctly_ mind you, because we are all aware of your prowess with talking around the issue, what happened in the 6 hours before you activated the protocol.” Admiral Alator asked with a look that said _‘you're pushing it as it is, don’t be an idiot.’_

And here he was, sat in front of a panel of people who hadn’t been there and hadn’t felt and heard and seen what he had in those moments, and was being asked to sum it up, in brief, so they could pass judgment on if what he did was right or wrong. He loved Starfleet, he believed in it and all its grand notions, he really did but right now, it was hard for him to feel anything but rage at an institution that was trying to rest the blame on him for something that should be blameless. _What was it that Wills says? ‘Tell the brass to fuck off, but don’t make them feel like they got no power over you. Keeps ‘em off yer arse mate.’_ So he breathed in and looked up, hoping he could make it through this without tears. “On Stardate 2262.233, at approximately 21:00 hours…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm taking liberties with Star Trek worldbuilding here, and I know the stardates are weird, basic calculation for stardate is the 4 digits of the year-.-day out of 365. So you know. Logical.


	2. Trapped

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BBC Merlin.... IN SPAACCEE!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On this weeks episode of Merlin.....IN SPACE!  
> The series of events that lead to Merlin facing down ceratain death from Romulan warbirds and confroting his deepest secret. he refects on Starfleet and who he really is. All this and more in....The Voyages Of The Starship Excalibur! Episode 2: "Trapped"

Stardate 2262.233

_ The bridge is usually quiet at the start of Delta shift, even during a war. Merlin remembers Wills just choking it up to “people gotta sleep, even the Romulans ‘ave to at some point.” And most of the time Merlin was thankful they got a bit of a break from the running and hiding they did at nearly all hours. The walk to the turbolift from his quarters was short but it felt like it took longer and longer everyday. The past 6 months had been a tough mix of brutal reality checks and excruciating boredom  _

_ The Monmouth had been sent on 12 separate reconnaissance missions, the first 5 of which turned out to be nothing more than babysitting a bunch of dead space on the edge of the beta quadrant with the occasional Cardassian civilian freighter trying to pick a fight.  _

_ The next 3 were straightforward supply drops or low priority personnel pickups for stranded federation outposts on the outskirts of where even the Romulan Empire cared to go. In Merlin’s opinion, not even the Federation really had much at stake other than a few asteroid groups and a couple of uninhabitable, unprofitable dwarf planets. But the next 4…..They were a reminder to most aboard the Monmouth, himself included, that a war was still in full swing outside the hull.  _

_ They were all supposed to be fairly standard rescue operations, no of which the Monmouth was supposed to run point on by themselves, but with the Romulans making more gains off the back of crushing an internal military coup, and taking down more than 38 Cardassian outposts in less then a year, the federation was stretched thin and instead of the standard 2 runabouts ships and a Med-Frigate detail, most survey ships had been converted to essentially rescue cruisers who had no back up or escorts. So when the Monmouth arrived to Federation outposts that had been scorched within an inch of their lives, or planets that had just been attacked with a thalaron generator that made it so it couldn't even be called a planet anymore, they tried their best but when you only have a handful of pieces to pick up... Merlin wonders if he should even call them rescues after that, after seeing the amount of survivors they had to leave at starbases with little more than a “you did what you could” and “I’m sorry for your loss”.  _

_ Most of the crew of the Monmouth, like most of the other Kelvin-class starships, had been fresh faced officers and ensigns just out of the academy, eager to explore, and to survey, to boldly go… that's what Merlin had signed up for, desperate to use the degree he had punished himself to get for 6 years. To prove he could be more than just that scrawny kid from Wales with a federation martyr for a father and a pair of ears that didn’t fit his head.  _

_ Everyone on board had wanted to be explorers, scientists, adventurers when they joined up, but when the tense peace with the Romulans had dissolved and the Cardassian empire decided to have a go at them, Merlin, like a lot of the crew, had felt the first 6 months on board had been a trick. A scheme just to get them to be soldiers in a war over something that happened 100 years ago.  _

_ Merlin sees it all as he passes by the crew on the way to the bridge, how tired and worn down and just exhausted everyone is. The cases of crew interpersonal incidents had gone up in the past year and the sickbay had a waiting list for Consular Adams that was longer than the combined lists from the previous 5 years.  _

_ The other night when Merlin was at Wills quarters for a drink and a chat after their shifts, Wills had said that the security department had to do double shifts because 3 of their officers had requested leaves of absence from the ship citing ‘emotional distress’. And Merlin couldn’t really blame them, after all, they had been the ones to most deal survivors after rescue ops. It just all seemed like they were stuck here with little else to do then wait for command to send them off to another tragedy. _

_ The ding of the turbo lift snapped him back to the present as he boarded the lift with a few harried ensigns scurrying in behind him. One cleared their throat. _

_ “Uh, Commander Emrys sir?” The stout Orion ensign with glasses squeaked. _

_ “Yes, ensign Douta?” _

_ “Is it true sir? What their saying about the, uh, well you know, about us being sent t-”  _

_ “Shhh, Sam! Stop, you're going to get us in trouble!” Another ensign holding a box of loose conduits and wires said, and in an attempt to get him to stop, stepped on his foot causing him to let out a ‘ow!’ and bump into Merlin. _

_ “I’M SORRY SIR! She pushed me and-” _

_ “It’s alright ensign! Really, it's fine.” Merlin responded, trying to keep his voice light and unconcerned. Even he had been hearing rumors between the bridge officers that they were getting moved to the alpha quadrant, closer to where the fighting was the heaviest because the federation was essentially running out of battle cruisers and it was seeming more and more were getting destroyed by the Romulan forces they went up against.  _

_ The lift went silent again. The soft verberation of the tube being the only sound left. Merlin let out a sigh. God, he was so tired and he should have brought coffee with him, but after the 3rd time spilling it on his station display and the sad puppy dog eyes of the ensign who had janitorial duty that day, he started just chugging his coffee before he left his quarters. Still, it’d be nice to have something for his hands to do right now other than repeatedly taping his pad against his thigh. If he kept at it, he’d give himself a bruise. He hated how tense everyone was. Ensign Douta spoke up again, this time a bit steadier but no less anxious. _

_ “Is it true though sir? What everyone is saying? Are we really...” _

_ Merlin turned then to look at him, saw how he was trying so hard to keep his head high. How scared he was. Merlin glanced at the other ensigns and they all just looked at him with the same face of heavy exhaustion that didn’t quite fit ensigns who were only probably 20. They were young and should be naive but they had seen enough to know that was a luxury right now.  _

_ And he saw this and didn’t know what to say, he was so, so tired and he missed his mum and he just wanted to see the stars. So he lied. It was harder than he was used to. _

_ “No Sam, we're not being moved anytime soon, besides, they need us out here looking at asteroids and surveying the dwarf planets of the big bad Romulan empire.” He said with a smile that felt a bit tight but was the best he could come up with. The ensigns breathed out a bit and chuckled at his attempt at levity.  _

_ It got quiet again, but it was a comfortable quiet. The doors swooshed open and the three ensigns stepped off, giving Merlin small nods or waves as they passed. He couldn’t help but look at them as they strode off down the halls and hoped the war would be over soon so they wouldn’t all look so out of sorts. The doors swung shut again and the lift moved up towards the bridge, cutting off his train of thought. Merlin braced himself against the side of the lift and closed his eyes, preparing himself for whatever somewhat monotonous task Captain Kilgharrah had for him today. _

_ Merlin was painfully aware that in a time of active war, having a Xeno-anthropologist on board as a XO was essentially useless, unless of course the Romulans could be defeated by having someone lecture them on Bojoran sporting customs and their similarities to early Vulcan hunting rituals. Then sure, Merlin would be an excellent tactics officer. So in an attempt to make himself useful as he could and to not get stuck with filling out the captains reports for him, he had taken up doing odd jobs on the bridge. He worked every department he could, made himself available to the data analysts down in operations when he could in hopes that his undergrad work as a research assistant for his uncle Giaus when he was at the academy wouldn’t go to waste, and generally tried to stay out of the way of the wrath of his CO.  _

_ The doors opened to the bridge and Merlin walked to his station, he passed a few engineering techs he recognized from his late nights in the security lab with Wills, though they weren’t disheveled as he remembered. As he got to his station his pad he had honestly forgotten he had in his hand buzzed.  _

_ Is it against Starfleet mandates to throttle _

_ your subordinates for being TOO productive? -W _

_ One of these days Will was going to shoot someone out an airlock and no one would be surprised. _

_ You know, murder is still murder Wills, even in space.  _

_ Also go easy on them, ya? It's not their fault that you’re their defacto CO.  _

_ You just need to be appreciative that they’re not all plotting your  _

_ death like your former CO was. -M _

_ Har Har. It's good your cute Merlin. I couldn’t stand ya otherwise. -W _

_ It was quite on the bridge tonight, or at least it felt quieter when Kilgharrah was in his ready room absorbed in god knows what Starfleet had him up to. At 20:00 hours the Monmouth was supposed to meet up with the CrazyHorse and the Tempest for rendezvous before their next assignment. Merlin was actually looking forward to it, he had volunteered for data swap duty to the CrazyHorse on behalf of Nora down in operations just so he could have something to do, but it was also cause he hadn’t seen Gwaine really since the war started and even though he’d be loathe to admit it, he missed him in all his overly affectionate glory. Will said it was because Gwaine had been kicked in the head by a Nimbosian horse when he was young that he didn’t know when to ‘get the fuck outa me face you twat’. Merlin liked that Gwaine didn’t really seem to give a shit, it was just who he was, and it was so different from how Merlin carried himself. Merlin always gave too much of a shit, his mum said it would be his downfall someday. _

_ The next half hour was not much of anything, reports were filed, he ignored Wills’ messages, he calibrated the aft sensor array, he kept ignoring Will, he sent a com to Gwaine to see if he wanted to get a drink after drop off. Nothing of note happened until the Tempest missed their check-in at 19:45. _

_ “Lieutenant Taylor, are our coms down, why hasn’t the Tempest checked in?” Merlin said, with an impressive amount of steadiness to his voice considering the panic he felt creeping up the back of his neck. _

_ “Our coms are just fine sir, the Tempest looks like their blocking our hail-“ _

_ BOOM. The ship shook violently as it was blasted off course and into the out track of the Ganatil belt. Merlin cursed himself for not sensing it earlier. Shit. They’ve been tailing us this whole time. _

_ “Red Alert Lieutenant! Shields up!” As soon as the siren went off, Khilgarha entered the bridge. He looked at Merlin and it almost seemed like he was disappointed. _

_ “Report Commander!” The captain said with enough authority to make cadets cry. _

_ Merlin was about to respond when the ship was hit again, this time stronger than the last. “View screen. Now.” Shouted Merlin as all systems went haywire. It looked like the Tempest was running from a cloaked warbird and the CrazyHorse was in pursuit.  _

_ “Taylor, try and hail the CrazyHorse, see if we can get ship to ship. Commander Nera bring us around to mark 35.76 just in front of the Tempest. We need to get the Warbird off its back. NOW Commander!” Khilgarah shouted.  _

_ Merlin looked at the Monmouth’s status on his station screen. They had only been hit twice and their shields were down to 30%. If they took another hit, they’d lose shields and- BOOM. Blinding light filled the view screen as the Tempest slammed into a large asteroid as the Warbird doubled back making a line for the Monmouth. _

_ “The Tempest is gone sir. Decks 7-12 and 24-28 are reporting mass system failures. Shields are at 30% Captain, but we can’t take another hit like that!” Merlin said as the aftershock of the explosion rocked the ship. He started to notify operations deck that they needed shield reserves on standby when another hit came. The navigation consoles exploded, sending Commander Nera and Lieutenant Ve’sh to the floor. Nera had been blasted through the chest with shrapnel and Ve’sh was bleeding from the head but was still conscious. _

_ “Ve’sh, take Nera and get to sick bay. Lieutenant Taylor, make sure he gets there.” Merlin shouted as he pulled Ve’sh to his feet, balancing Nera on his shoulder. “I’ll transfer coms to my station, now go!” he rushed back to his station as the group limped towards the lift. Other crew had been injured or killed in the minor explosions on the bridge. “Captain, the CrazyHorse is hailing us, their shields are down, and auxiliary has failed. Our shields are at 13% and falling” Merlin relayed as he rushed to help an injured ensign to the lift. The view screen blinked again as the Warbird decloaked followed by 2 more ships on their flank. Shit. _

_ “Emrys, tell the CrazyHorse to fall back, message Starfleet and let them know our position. Ensign Zora, take navigation and brin-“ He was cut off by another hit to their shields that must have blown through several decks. The empty station next to the Captain's chair exploded in a shower of sparks, Khilgarah staggered out of his chair before collapsing. Merlin rushed over, finding him holding his chest as bright red soaked through the gold uniform. Merlin tried to lift him but was thrown off balance by another hit. ‘Shields down, engineering deck unresponsive.’ The computer said over the din of the bridge. _

_ “Ensign Zora, escort the captain to sick bay!” He said while ripping part of the uniform and tying a tunicate around the captain’s chest.  _

_ “Merlin,” the captain heaved out “You have to do what....” He breathed in a ragged breath. “You are capable of more than you know” And the way he said it made Merlin freeze. He couldn’t know? Not now, not when… Then ensign Zora dragged Khilgarha away to the lift before Merlin could make sense of what had happened. He blinked and reality faded back in. _

_ He looked around, the last three commanders were either unconscious or dead as the captain was taken from the bridge. Four ensigns remained, each at emergency stations, each with that same look on their face, but this time it felt real. _

_ “Ensign Harken, give me a status on shields and weapons.” Merlin said as he sat down in the captain’s chair trying very hard to keep his hands from shaking. Would he have to do what he promised his mum he wouldn’t do unless it was necessary? And really, could he even… he had never done anything remotely in the realm of the amount of energy he would need to protect the whole ship, he didn’t even know if he could stop once he started, he didn’t- _

_ “Shields are down sir, weapons are unresponsive, and they’ve cloaked again sir.” But that last part didn’t make sense. Why would they cloak again, they were basically sitting ducks out here, the only reasons Romulans cloak after they’ve essentially won a fight is if….BOOOOOM. The hull of the ship screamed as it was torn back by the hooks extended from the boarding pods the Romulan scout ship had launched at the Monmouth. They were boarding. They were boarding the bridge. _

_ “Ensign Harken, start evac protocols and get everyone off the bridge! The rest of you, clear out-” the computer interrupted with a siren indicating a hull breach in the hallway leading from the bridge to deck one. In one move, Merlin pushed most of the rest of the ensigns in the turbolift and sent them to their escape pods. “Harken, Farris, both of you, get in your Kelvin pods and get off the ship, signal the CrazyHorse if you can. What's left of the crew needs time to escape-”  _

_ “Commander, i’m not leaving the ship, someone needs to help make sure the crew gets to safety!” Harken said, Farris nodded. _

_ “Were not abandoning you Captain, we have a duty to fulfill!” And the way Farris said that made Merlin hope that he could live up to it. They both looked scared. Really scared. But he also probably did too. Harken and Farris just looked at him as they locked out the turbolift and sent out even more orders to abandon ship. Merlin just stared at these too young designs trying their best to uphold hope when it was too easy to despair. He wanted to be just like them. _

_ The ship shifted again as the pods continued to break through the ships defenses, all systems were in the red and most of the crew that had survived was off the ship. Merlin stood on the bridge and looked out at the viewscreen and realized he was never going to see his mum again.  _

_ “Commander Farris” he said, realizing that he was now the Captain which made them Commanders. “how close are they to breaking through?” _

_ “It's hard to tell Sir, without knowing the exact tech, it could be in 30 seconds or 3 minutes.” Neither of which sounded ideal. _

_ “How about coms Harken, can we get those up for ship to ship?” _

_ “Not likely, it looks like their jamming coms in the whole area.”  _

_ “So what are our options?” He said looking between the two now commanders huddled over the one remaining station. Another more violent shake of the ship came and the computer indicated ‘full hull breach detected’. The blast doors to the bridge would give them maybe another 5 minutes. That is if the ship stayed together long enough. _

_ “Captain, our weapons are down and the core is basically shot….Sir...” But Harken didn’t need to say much more, the Romulans had boarded which meant they wanted the ships data which meant that the three of them were all the Monmouth had left.  _

_ He rushed over to the panels lining the bridge holding emergency equipment and prayed to the universe that there was a phaser or two as well. Finding two phasers, he handed them off and proceeded to rip what was left of the navigation console apart. _

_ “Sir, what are you doing?” A banging started up on the door to the bridge. _

_ He didn’t respond, he continued piercing together what he hoped would be a grenade from the processing system of the panel and a flare he grabbed from the emergency panel. The bangging turned to repeated hits from a high powered phaser. He stood and rushed all of them behind the turned over command stations. _

_ “Were going to have to fight, I'm going to throw this first,” holding up the jerryrigged explosive “than wait 3 seconds, after that fire at will into the doorway. Aim for the center if you can. And if that fails, run to the kelvin pods in the ready room, barricade your selves in and leave-'' an explosion from the door sent shrapnel flying. tThe grunts and shouts or Romulan soldiers could be heard now. Merlin threw the grenade at the door, hitting a soldier in the chest before exploding into a shower of read sparks. Two soldiers fell to the ground and phaser fire from both sides lit up the darkened bridge. More entered the bridge and fired at them, Harken was hit in the shoulder before going down. “No!” Merlin moved to pull him aside but another Romulan shot Harken again as he tried to get up. No. No. No. No. He... _

_ “Captain, he's gone!” Farris cried “We can't do anything now.” She said, still firing at the door. Merlin bit back a scream as fired blindly into the smoke now filling the bridge. “Get to your kelvin pod Farris,” she looked like she was going to argue “that's an order! Go!” He covered her as best he could as she ran to the ready room door behind them. He looked again at Harken, knowing that he should have ordered them both to leave earlier. They could have stopped it all as soon as it started if he hadn’t been so scared. _

_ Suddenly the firing stopped and footsteps hurried on the bridge. The smoke filled the air and Merlin couldn't see anything but the hazy glare of the view screen. He continued to fire till a figure rushed toward him and kicked him in the chest. Falling back he scrambled for his phaser but was kicked again in his side. A hand grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him up to his knees. _

_ “Vikra 'hh ieiuqh shanaku” Masked Romulan shouted as he held a knife to Merlins throat. Merlin tried to remember some of the Romulan he picked up in the past year. The soldier kicked him in his stomach and shouted again.  _

_ “Vikra 'hh ieiuqh shanaku’ Valhthealh hevam!”  _

_ Merlin pushed himself up to his hands, blood dripping from his mouth. He responded as best he could, hoping if he stalled long enough he could make sure everyone was off the ship and out of the way of the Romulan ships.  _

_ “Aeek'h'i shanaku? Uh I….Hveolhaonn raed'aeusnnta'jhiy….uhh...iebhe i'mae aeek'h'i hwiiy ssraei.” They were focused now on the bridge of the Monmouth, they wouldn’t care about the crew escaping. A hand lifted him by his hair and slashed at his chest with the knife. He hissed out, ignoring the pain now in his chest “Hveolhaonn raed'aeusnnta'jhiy iebhe i'mae vikra ta'hwswai 'hh!” More Romulan soldiers surrounded him, he was dragged over to the last station left and shoved into it. One soldier spoke up, in standard this time. _

_ “Open the data files or you will be killed.” she said _

_ “I’ll be killed either way, why-” a fist stopped him from saying anything more. She repeated her order when he noticed a proximity alarm start to blink. If it was Romulan or Starfleet he didn't know but he knew he couldn’t risk what he was about to do in the brief hope that it could be help. He pulled himself up, ignoring the blood dripping from above his eye, and keyed in a command to open the blast doors. The controls in the doors were fried and the attempt caused a small explosion that distracted them for a moment. One of the Romulans shouted something that Merlin thought sounded like a shout to hurry up to his comrades as they backed away from the now on fire back console of the bridge.  _

_ The confusion from the Romulan soldiers and the spreading fire gave him enough time to key in a self destruct sequence that would preserve the federation data on the ship and possibly allow for even more time for the escaping crew to put distance between themselves and the Romulans. The view screen showed more warbirds dropping out of warp and Merlin knew then he had to make the call. He shouted over the din of Romulan officers yelling back and forth between each other about federation vessels entering the Ganatil belt, “Initiate self destruct sequence 4, Command code 1017, Acting-Captain Merlin Emrys.” The computer responded with a 10 minute countdown clock, systems were shut down and most power was diverted to destruct sequence.  _

_ He stood there for a moment in the chaos of the panicked Romulan voices and shower of small sparks around him as systems went into override and looked out the view screen, past the Romulan ships and stared into the beautiful emptiness of space. He reached out now, now that it was soon the end for him and felt his magic in him. Hurting from disuse and so, so, lonely. It felt scared and regretful of all the things it never did, that he never let it do. It was quite high grass fields and deafening births of stars. The belief in seeing all that he could and the homesickness of a farm kid from Wales. It was all that he was and all that he could be, well….could’ve been. It stretched out and felt the ships around him and the people in those ships, the rocks that floated in inky blackness and the silence of space itself and he started to cry. For the fear that had led him to not use his gift when others needed it most. He was scared and he thought of his mum and how she would have said ‘it's alright silly boy, you were all you could have been.’  _

_ A hand gripped his shoulder and pushed him to his knees, a knife to his neck. They shouted again about data but Merlin just closed his eyes and pushed his magic through him. It was messy and dangerous and scary. It blasted the rest of the soldiers back, slamming them into the fire covered walls and back into the hallway. It felt good to use his power one last time. He heard transport beams sound out for some of the Romulans, the yells of ‘our ship is losing power’ and ‘cloaking has drained the core’ of others, till he was alone again, surrounded by the bodies of his crew. He saw Harken, still motionless and cold, and so young, and bent down to close his eyes. He looked and saw others too, down the hallway where the scout ship had ripped through, he saw Ensign Douta, propped against a wall, crushed under a support beam. Merlin looked back at the countdown. 5 minutes. Just that to make peace with the universe. He sent one last distress signal out, more out of habit then anything, and sat down against the console and closed his eyes.  _

_ He should have said I love you more to his mum. He should have skipped school with Wills that one time. He should have had that last drink with Gwaine. Fallen in love, maybe just once. Stayed on Ogat, become that Klingon warrior monk he could have been. He never did get to see the birth of a supernova, he should have taken those personal days like uncle Gaius said. But here he was, arse end of the universe on a ship that was about to explode.  _

_ He looked around, the fires had stopped, a lack of oxygen from life support failure would do that, and saw what had been a ship he had dreamed about serving on, now charred and lonely and quiet. 2 minutes. His magic comforted him, said that he could survive this if he pushed himself, but he knew it was too late. He was so tired. He cupped his hands and whispered the first spell he remembered. Small blue butterflies drifted out, off and up over his head. He looked out again at the view screen, obscured by little blue wings and sparks. Tears fell from his cheeks and landed as miniscule petals on his legs. He leaned forward, pressing his face against his knees and remembered what his mum smelled like and how Will laughed. He remembered home. Home. _

_ An explosion outside the viewscreen and the crackle of the coms made him sit up. Two federation vessels swept across the screen followed by the explosion of two of the warbirds. The other ships fled through the belt, pursued by battle cruisers.  _

_ “Momouth, can you read? This is the Bamburgh, do you read? Come in Monmouth!” Merlin staggered to his feet and looked at the count down. 1 minute. “Cancel detonation 4, Command code 1017, Acting-Captain Merlin Emrys.”  _

_ ‘Confirm cancelation?’ _

_ “Confirm Monmouth.” He breathed out. He switched to coms. “This is Commander Merlin Emrys. Requesting assistance Bamburgh. Mass system failure. Shields down, life support down. Are you reading Bamburgh?” He nearly shouted at the console _

_ “Reading Monmouth, send us your coordinates” _

_ “Negative. Systems are down, current position is mark 675-42 by mark 880-01. 4 warbirds entered the belt at mark 675-48. 3 scout ships and 1 command cruiser followed. Tempest is gone, CrazyHorse fell back. Most of the crew evacuated, rescue crews are needed. Are you hearing Bamburgh? Rescue crews needed for escaped crew.”  _

_ “Relayed Monmouth, rescue crews in route. Stand by for assist, eta to your position, 6 minutes.” _

_ The coms cut out and Merlin nearly collapsed. He was shaking, tears blurring his vision as he looked out the view screen. Tiny stars illuminated his face and felt his magic flow out one more time, feeling this small part of the universe. He pulled it back, placed it in that spot inside him where he knew it was safe and sat against the console again.  _

_ Tilting his head back, a sob wracked his body and an overwhelming heaviness washed over him. He was so tired. Dozing off, his magic surrounding him with little blue butterflies and the stars seemed to twinkle on the viewscreen.  _

_ Destiny Merlin, has a funny way of finding you. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that got dark. But hey, such is the authors prerogative.


End file.
